Friday, April 22, 2011

Review :: Armchair Telepathy :: Naked on the Vague


Naked on the Vague :: Twelve Dark Noons EP :: Sacred Bones :: Released March 29


I set out on a reconnaissance mission the other day, rescuing beaten and hogtied slabs of vinyl that might otherwise have fallen into the crippled hands of a nonbeliever. I ducked into Smash and picked up some Neil Young and Magazine records, but decided to leave behind nine copies of the same Municipal Waste album.
I passed by Crooked Beat, having had enough déjà vu for the week. Red Onion was tranquil as ever - I picked up some sounds from the Austrian woodlands, then relieved the pressure in my head by drilling a Sacred Bones-sized hole in my skull. We mentioned this release and the film of the same name back in December. The teaser gave little indication as to what the soundtrack would do to my ears, but that's why it's called a teaser. I haven't really grown up from being the butt-end of ridicule on the 4th grade four square court. Naked on the Vague knows this, told me I looked exquisitely handsome and that I must come from a wealthy family, and then pummeled me with brutal sonic vulgarities. And the sick part is that I hide the tears, put a smile on my face and continue following them.

Naked on the Vague are contributing to the legion of Australian psych bands currently turning the Outback into an obliterated wasteland. "Dracula fronting the B-52s" as male-lead Matthew Hopkins put it, and he really couldn't be more spot on. But, to be clear, Hopkins has apparently been at the necks of every other member of the band, and they're all in a gothic lock-groove throughout the EP. Like a functioning nuclear vampire family that hasn't grown tired of eachother after 400 years. Or maybe the lack of a life force negates the need for cooperation?

The Twelve Dark Noons film premiered last night in NYC, with a special performance by NOTV. Check out the music video for EP cut "Clock of 12s" below:

Thursday, April 21, 2011

News :: Sometimes We're Allowed Outdoors :: Crystal Stilts



Crystal Stilts/German Measles
Black Cat Backstage
1811 14th Street NW, Washington, DC
Friday, April 22, 2011

Crystal Stilts :: Shackles

They should be bigger than this, but then it's not the first act we've caught at the Black Cat's back stage in the past few months where we had the same thought. They should be on the mainstage: Mike Watt, Kurt Vile, Twin Shadow. Hell, with as much buzz as these guys get, and with the way they back it up, they should be selling out two nights wherever they want in town.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, tevs, what the fuck. Crystal Stilts are going to be shitting little psychedelic bricks all over the stage, and I'll be one of like 15 people to be there to smell them.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Video :: Remote Viewing :: Grouper


Grouper
"Alien Observer"
A.I.A. : Alien Observer (short LP)

Just in case you're in the mood for something atmospheric, or alternatively, if you thought the L Word could have used a little more black blood of the earth.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

News :: Record Store Day 2011


I think we can all agree Record Store Day has gotten a little out of hand. I'm a much bigger fan of record store day, the one where I roll out of bed every Tuesday, grab a coffee and a fresh Choco Pie, check my funds with the robotic teller, and determine how many records I can afford while still adhering to my phantom alcohol budget. You know that one. But, if the Upper-Case Annual Big Deal keeps the economy spinning during the holiday-starved month of April, so be it. Where's my Hallmark card for Record Store Day - one that spells out all the sweet nothings for me.

To make it all nice n' sleazy for you, the fine folk(s) over at Red Onion Records & Books have compiled their personal list of special releases for today, most of which will sit on the shelves for about 30 seconds before appearing on eBay for $500. But, some of these titles kick ass, so you won't want to sleep in. Grab your umbrella and your most fashionable pair of galoshes, and get in line by 11am. Doors open at noon.

The List:

  • Glenn Jones/Black Twig Pickers: Even to Win is to Fail/Mont Syrup LP
  • Mitchell and Manley: Norcal Values LP
  • Oval/Liturgy: Split LP
  • Big Star: Third LP (test pressing version)
  • Superchunk/Coliseum: split 7"
  • Vivian Girls: I Heard You Say 7"
  • Red Hot Chili Peppers/Ramones 7"
  • New Pornographers: Moves 7"
  • Kings of Leon: Holy Roller Novacaine 10"
  • Polvo: Celebrate the New Dark Age LP
  • Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin: Broom LP
  • Various Artists: Franz Ferdinand Covers 12"
  • Yeasayer: End Blood 7"
  • Pressed At Boddie (Numero Records compilation on LP)
  • Flaming Lips: Heady Nuggs 5LP box set
  • Phish: Two Soundchecks 7"
  • Built to Spill: Ripple picture disc 7"
  • Black Angels: Another Nice Pair LP
  • Deerhunter: Memory Boy 7"
  • Fleet Foxes: Helplessness Blues 12"
  • Fucked Up: The Town LP
  • Lower Dens: Deer Knives 7"
  • Panda Bear: Tomboy LP & t-shirt
  • Blitzen Trapper: Maybe Baby 7"
  • Quicksand: self-titled 7"
  • Burn: self-titled 7"
  • Youth of Today: self-titled 7"
  • Elliot: U.S. Songs LP
  • Black Market Baby: Potential Suicide 7"
  • Decemberists: Live at Bull Moose CD
  • AC/DC: Shoot to Thrill 7"
  • Adele: Rolling in the Deep 10"
  • Sonic Youth: Whore's Moaning 12"
  • Bruce Springsteen: Gotta Get the Feeling 7"
  • Various Artists: Follow Me Down - Vanguard's Lost Psychedelic Era 2LP
  • Television: Live at the Old Waldorf 2LP
  • Beach Boys: Good Vibrations 78
  • Deftones: Covers LP
  • Jimmy Eat World: Bleed American 3LP
  • Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers: self-titled LP
  • Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers: You're Gonna Get It LP
  • Caribou: Swim Remixes 12"
  • Country Joe & The Fish: Electric Music for the Mind and Body LP
  • Death Cab For Cutie: In Living Stereo 7"
  • Deerhoof: Friend Opportunity LP
  • Dom: Things Change 10"
  • Foo Fighters: Medium Rare LP
  • Grateful Dead: self-titled mono LP
  • Grinderman: Evil 12"
  • Grinderman: Palaces of Montezuma 12"
  • Jimi Hendrix: Fire 7"
  • Justin Townes Earle: Move Over Mama 7"
  • Mississippi John Hurt: The Immortal LP
  • Owen: O, Evelyn 7"
  • Piebald: Volume I-III 3LP
  • Skip James: Today LP
  • Syd Barrett: An Introduction to... LP
  • The Doors: Riders on the Storm 7"
  • Various Artists: Portable Shrines Magic Sound Theater 2LP
  • Antony & the Johnsons: Swanlights 10"
  • Architecture in Helsinki: Places Like This LP
  • Arthur Russell: World of Echo 2LP
  • Joan Of Arc: Don't Mind Control LP
  • Damien Jurado: Live at Landlocked LP
  • Queen: Keep Yourself Aive 7"
  • Wild Flag: Future Crimes 7"
  • Jimmy Eat World: Bleed American 3LP
  • Kill Rock Stars LP
  • John Fahey: Requia LP
There's a shit-ton more titles available at nearby shops like Crooked Beat, Smash, and Som Records, but my eyes are actually dripping thick, viscous, hot red sap from staring at lists in Excel format. Read the full official list here, if you think pain makes you a stronger human being. I'm a simple man, and can appreciate minimal options.

Who knew Choco Pies were made from natural Chinese pig poo?

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Reviews:: Electronic Voice Phenomena :: Triptides


I want you to know that I hate wintertime. Wesley Willis would say, "Fuck uh snow flake in dee ass." And I know just how he feels, because he's not just talking about snowflakes, he's really talking about man's inhumanity towards man made somehow worse by nature's inhuman unnaturality towards man.

Yuh dig?

But then every now and again some kind of good can come from entire cities boarding up for the zombie-er months of the year: first off, there's less meatheads running around, chasing skirt in Adams Morgan and Georgetown, then there's the occasional plainclothes Dirty Harry drawing down on snowball tossers (those hippies), reminding us all why it's good to make sure cops get their Xmas bonuses, and, finally, a few talented and very fucking bored individuals sit down and record some totally sweet sounds. And when spring unfolds its splendor, unfouls its lines, and dumps it shitty rain on us, we can stay inside and give those songs a listen. We can think about the sun-baked beaches where we'd rather be.

Triptides take me there.

Out in the winter wasteland of Bloomington, IN (go fig), these dudes put down one, two, three, no wait, four tracks of the smoothest possible surf pop instead of going outside and facing certain death. The arrangements here are so goddamn natural, you'd swear you wrote them yourself. I'm listening to them now with the last of my bourbon balanced on my chest, and I'm pretty damn sure I'm not awake because I keep falling for the charms of a winking crab, gesturing for me to lie down, take a load off on his stretched out towel. There's no where to go, and no where to be, anyway. So just embrace the sandy tranquility offered by the Maryland Blue with the caviar eyeballs and the simpleton grin. What say you, Triptides: Now that we're looking summer straight in the mean-eyed face, how about you get out and take a trip down the coast?

Must be some kind of record since this is the second Indiana band to be mentioned here this week. Should I be getting paid for this? Nah, I don't have to be here. I could be in Florida, basking in the sun. This is just a hobby for me, yuh hear? A HOBBY!




Ripped from their Bandcamp page:
Glenn Brigman - vox/guitar/drums/keys
Josh Menashe - vox/bass/guitar